I was reading some gchat conversations that I had with some friends about a year ago from now, and wow, it amazes me how far God has brought me within this past year, how much healing he has brought me. I was talking to Debra today about our struggles. Last year, for me especially, I struggled a lot with depression, resulting from a lot of drama going on during senior year, but also as a result of my expectations of people that could not be fulfilled. I've since realized how often I am disappointed when I rely on others to help me through things, when I am "needy" towards other people and when I turn to others in my brokenness. People are always changing, and not many of us are blessed with the ability to care deeply and understand thoroughly the needs and struggles of other people. One thing that I have learned is the importance of turning to God as my healer, my refuge in times of struggle and trial, that when He has given me peace in my heart and assurance of my identity in Him, I am never disappointed when I receive encouragement from a friend afterwards. God is soo faithful, he is so faithful to heal.
With patience and the will to think of only what is edifying to us spiritually, God can teach us how to be faithful. Psalm 37:3 says "Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness".
One thing that my youth pastor told me about the healing process: We often desire for God to heal is immediately. We say, daddy, please heal me now, I just want to feel better. But God needs time, and as we are impatient, we dig ourselves deeper into our sin, making it harder for God to heal our wounds. let's perservere in this race.
Currently listening: India Arie- Testimony Volume 2: Love and Politics :)
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